That shade of Humiliation looks great on you.

Halloween found me wearing 5-inch platform shoes, a long blonde wig, and an Alice in Wonderland dress. It also found me at a party where at least 3 men were dressed as women.

I had been talking to a boy for 5 minutes when he suddenly poked my chest (which was at his eye-level) and asked, "What are your boobs made out of?"

I thought it was unusual that a complete stranger had just felt me up, and I looked at him, confused. "They're just...my boobs," I said, not understanding.

It took a moment to sink in.

I took off my wig and vowed not to wear the platform shoes for another 365 days.






(Also pictured: Penelope, who dances like this in front of complete strangers.)