My New Fitness Program

I recently saw an advertisement on TV while watching VH1's top twenty video countdown. The advertisement is for a workout program called "Flirty Girl Fitness." As far as I can tell, the workout consists of learning "classic sexy dance moves" from a variety of places. There are a number of DVDs available for sale, so you can do this workout program at home. Instead of treadmills, stairmasters, and weights, you get to work out with kitchen chairs, feather boas, and stripper poles. The dancing is so much fun that apparently, you forget that you're working out. Well that sounds great. Couldn't we all use a workout program like that? But here's what I really want to know: if I forget that I'm working out, will I also forget that by doing this program, I might as well just get a job as a stripper? Will I forget that I am shredding any hint of my dignity while dancing with a pink feather boa and straddling my kitchen chairs? Will I forget that I'll never be able to look at myself in the mirror again after dancing in my living room to DVDs titled "Booty Beat" and "Just Teasing?"

Why don't you get back to me on that, Flirty Girl Fitness. Then I might consider ordering your Teaser Collection Kit, and possibly even a "Fitness" Pole with the extension.